7-26-2020

Hello everyone, I hope you are all doing well! It has recently been our anniversary but we are going to wait a little bit to go out and celebrate it. I had ordered him a gift and since covid has affected shipping from other countries, it's going to take a while :( He even told me that my gift was 10 dollars but shipping was 50. I can't wait for things to go back to normal.

I have been trying to find some more anime or movies to watch when I have free time but I haven't found anything that have really interested me haha. I did get back into Invader Zim though and watched the Netflix movie, it was really good! I like how they fleshed out Gaz's character and I like her design a lot more too since it fits her personality more. I was obsessed with that show when I was a teen and I remember getting so much merch of it from Hot Topic. I still have some of my shirts and my gir backpack hehe.

A friend and I have been trying to make a Doom wad recently, we are both trying to make one that is completely awful and garbage haha. Speaking of Doom, I wonder if people still play Zandronium which is based off skulltag. I used to play it all the time online and I remember playing all sorts of wads with other people. I remember playing some wads where you could change your skin to Barney or Pikachu haha. My name tag was Tamama, which is a character from keroro gunsou. If it still works, I would love to play it again sometime..




7-20-2020

First entry of the month even though it's a little too late for it and I will have to make one for August soon haha. I have been pretty busy lately with work, having so many phones a day from pissed off people. People are just stressful like always..On the bright side, I got a promotion and will be making some more money and I have been updating my site a lot more. I finished the Jirachi and Crystal Pepsi (rip) shrine and the KMFDM one is very close to being finished. I have to relisten to Opium and some of their more recent stuff since it has been a while. I also updated my guestbook and links page to look more "aesthetic". I am really proud with how they have turned out!

I have been re-reading my personal dream journal and I realized that Doom Generation shows up a ton in them. I would either be buying the soundtrack, the movie will be playing somewhere or getting merch of it (which is none irl). I wonder why since I haven't watched or even listened to the soundtrack in a long while, guess it's because I really loved that movie growing up? I dunno, I just found it weird.

I have still been going to therapy and it has been helping some. Going back to medication was an option but I am still very iffy about it, especially since I had abused it in the past. I really doubt it will happen again but sometimes I have very "drastic" episodes and I feel like that I might try it again so..I will say no for now. The American healthcare system is fucked up so that's another reason why I won't try it, I remember having to pay like $2000 after being sent to the hosptial that was caused by a breakdown I had.

Since our anniversary is coming up, my bf and I have been talking about what to do but we are both still afraid of going out a lot since covid is still bad here in 'merica. I really hope we can do something..I love spending time with him and I love him so much.